Close Relationships   I and Thou focuses on self-identity and the interface between one individual and others. The nature of close relationships and bonding is discussed. A human tendency is to suffer loneliness and to become suspicious and hostile when alone for extended periods. The strongest drive is to have a deep bond with one person, the soul mate, lover and custodian. Devotion frees.

Humans are social animals and generally depend on each other to provide context and meaning. "Thinking" is mostly talking, a social activity. Isolated individuals with talk to themselves and will tend to lose track of what is important and real without interactions with others. Humans interact continuously and although they may not agree with one another, still seek and require consensus about what is real and true. Humans build a culture from sharing experiences and reporting conscious experiences. Here is an expert from the book, describing the Self.

"Each human discovers who she or he is in an ongoing series of revelations. Humans often have the illusion of inventing themselves from nothing. They often claim to be the authors of their own destiny, but they are passengers in an ancient vehicle on a journey that they have difficulty comprehending. As humans journey through life, they continue to discover who they are and what it means. If they have choices in the direction of their journey, reasonable decisions are achieved by diligent effort, learning and practice. The process of individuation depends on the opportunities provided by the local environment and by practicing innate abilities and following innate tendencies.

The journey through life is expressed and understood by telling stories. Human stories have inner and outer forms. The inner story is a continuous narrative in the mind. This private monologue can be referred to as selftalk. Manifest stories are the daily conversations that dominate human social life. If you had to choose a feature of humans that separate them from all other animals it would be speaking. Story-telling is the most prevalent form of speaking.

The aspiration to live a happy, productive life is common. Happiness is not a discrete state, nor a sustainable state, but humans have the idea of happiness as they do about beauty, justice and goodness. To enjoy life humans need to feel appreciated, safe and secure. Basic happiness is achieved by securing access to adequate food, water and shelter and by winning the approval of the local group and gaining entitlement to whatever safety and security the local group can achieve.

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I and Thou